Keeping them safe one contract at a time
Two years ago, when Keaton and Justis were in fourth and sixth grades, I made them sign an Internet Contract that I got from SafeKids.com.
Two years ago Keaton and Justis were just starting out on the internet. They had used computers for years playing Reading Rabbit and other kids’ games. But as they got older they began to move in to the sometimes unknown and unpredictable world of the internet. And I wanted to make sure they new the risks. We set up an email account for each of them and an IM account [which we limited so they could only receive messages from somebody on their buddy list] and they were set.
They weren’t all that interested in IM or chat rooms. They IMed a little bit and Justis did get in to some chat rooms, but for the most part they used the internet to find new “grown up” games.
Recently they have started to get in to online gaming. They love Call of Duty [both the original and and Call of Duty II], Warcraft and Risk. [Yes, all of the good war games.] Sometimes they play each other and Dad on our home network and sometimes they play strangers on the internet. This never really bothered me much because they were too busy playing and didn’t have a lot of time for talking.
However, this morning I found out Keaton has a Xanga site. [For those who don't know Xanga is one of the top three website "communities" for kids; the other two being LiveJournal and MySpace. Basically it's a blogging site with some added features of allowing you to link in to some blogrolling and such.]
Keaton knew what a blog was [obvioulsy, since everybody knows I have one] and he knew about Xanga because a lot of his friends have Xanga sites. But up until now he didn’t have his own.
I won’t go in to all of the gory details of how I found out he had this site. The short version is I found out his friend had a site. So I called over to his friend’s house to ask Keaton if he [Keaton] had one too.
“Do you have a Xanga website?”
“Yes. I just created it today.”
“What’s the address?”
Keaton gave me the address. However, I wasn’t spelling it right and I couldn’t get to it. So I asked him to send it to me on IM.
After I looked over the site I said, “Two years ago you signed a contract for me regarding internet safety.”
“Yeah.”
“Well there are some things on this site that violate that contract.”
“There are? What?”
“You signed the contract. You tell me.”
“Oh my name and our city?”
“Yep, that’s it.”
Later that day, when Keaton got home from his friend’s house, we sat down for a chat. I figured it was time we review those internet safety guidelines and sign a new contract.
So Keaton, Justis, Lee and I sat down and went over the rules again. This time around I also talked about blogging and the concerns that come with that.
We reminded the boys there are consequences for not following the rules and we will enforce them. I also let them know that we can install software on their computers to track every keystroke they make. I don’t want to do that, but I will if I think I need to.
I also let them know that if they have a presence on the web, any presence at all, dad and I need to know the URL. And if they don’t give us the URl “the consequences won’t be worth the risk.”
Then we required them to sign a new contract. Keaton and Justis handled it very well. They seemed to understand how deadly serious we are about this. Justis now has a Xanga site too and they are both very particular about the information they have on there. I think the talk went really well. They really are good kids.
Here is the contract we used if you’d like to use it for your kids:
INTERNET SAFETY AGREEMENT
I understand I can have fun on the internet, but I also need to use caution. I will always remember that while I may be by myself or with friends in the privacy of our own homes, the internet is a very public place and anybody can see it and read it. In order to have the privilege of using the World Wide Web, I need to follow the following rules, so I can keep myself and my family safe:
- I will never give out personal information to anyone online without my parent�s permission, including but not limited to:
- my full name, or anyone else’s
- my address, or anyone else’s
- the state I live in, or anyone else�s
- the city I live in, or anyone else�s
- my passwords, or anyone else’s
- my phone number, or anyone else’s
- the name of my school, or anyone else�s
- the name of my sports team, or anyone else�s
- my photo or video, or anyone else�
- I will always be polite when chatting online; either on IM, in chat rooms or in a blog. I will treat them with the respect that I expect to be given. And I will treat them the same way I would treat them in person. If I am treated unkindly, I will not reciprocate in the same manner. I will leave the chat room or block buddies on IM if I get too angry. If I feel uncomfortable I will tell my parents right away so they can contact the service provider.
- I will never personally meet anyone I have �met� online without the permission of my parents. If this opportunity should arise, I fully expect my parents to come to the meeting.
- I will never call anyone I have �met� online without the permission of my parents.
- I will report all incidents in chat rooms to my parents and to the room administrators.
- I will not go internet surfing in areas that are not appropriate including, but not limited to websites:
- that are of a sexual nature
- that promote hate
- that are offensive in language
- that are of a violent nature
- I will follow these rules whether I am at home, at school, at the library, at a friend�s house or anywhere else. If my friend is not following these rules, I will leave.
- I will not purchase anything online without my parent�s permission.
- I will check with my parents before downloading or installing software or doing anything that could possibly hurt our computer, our network or jeopardize my family�s privacy.
- I will be a good online citizen and not do anything that hurts other people or is against the law. I will avoid posting anything that could embarrass me, my friends or our family members now or later. I will always remember, what I post on my blog, on IM or in a chat room can be copied and stored and could come back to haunt me years later.
If I do not follow these rules I expect that I will lose privileges including, but not limited too:
- Temporary to complete loss of internet privileges.
- Temporary to complete loss of ALL computer privileges.
- Loss of computer privacy; tracking software may be installed on my PC so my parents can read everything I type in chat rooms, IM, email and websites/blogs.
- Temporary to complete loss of privileges to spend time with friends; including no going over to a friend�s house after school or on weekends and no overnights.
I have read and understand the terms of this contract. I agree to always follow these rules and I accept these consequences.
Child�s Signature:____________________________
Parent’s Signature:___________________________
[...] kids started getting on the internet and created their first social networking profile, I made them sign an internet contract. We revisit that contract often so we are sure the kids understand the rules. We make it clear that [...]