I know what you’re thinking pervert and it’s not like that. It’s really a play on Matthew McConaughey’s movie How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days. And why am I titling posts after Matthew McConaughey movies? Because I was supposed to meet him last night. But at the last minute he bailed. Men!

I know, I’m rambling.

You may have heard of a little bike ride called RAGBRAI. This is where crazy people get on their bikes for a week straight and ride from one side of Iowa to the other. And not only do they ride their bikes all day long, but many of them drink beer all night long. I don’t know how they do it. I can’t even make it halfway down my street on a bike without breathing heavy. And it’s all downhill.

Last night the pit stop was in Newton, IA. Lance Armstrong was scheduled to speak and he was supposed to be bringing Matthew McConaughey. At least that was the plan as of early last week.

Then this Tuesday we heard that his reps actually could not confirm that our buddy Matt would be there. What?!? I already made plans. I’ve worked out every day for a week. I’ve thought pretty thoughts. I’ve worked on controlling my drooling. I was ready. How dare he not show.

But there was still a chance. And you know how pissed we’d be if we stayed home and Matthew did show up. Very!

So my friend’s Carolyn and Pat and I decided to drive all the way to Newton to maybe catch a glimpse. Pat was more interested in meeting Lance, but Carolyn and I wanted to touch…I mean meet the hunky Matthew McConaughey.

However, I had my final for class. So I couldn’t leave until around 7pm. We didn’t get in to Newton until around 9pm. Lance had just finished up his speech by then [but he did mention something about possibly coming back next year to ride the whole thing from the eastern border of Iowa to the western border]. And Matthew was nowhere to be found.

Later in the night we met up with the mayor of Newton [who we happen to know and was hoping he could hook us up with a romantic encounter....I mean meet and greet with Matthew] and he told us that Matt didn’t show. Damn him. I put makeup on. I haven’t put makeup on all summer. Plus I straightened my hair. With a straightening iron. I’ve worn my hair up so many days in a row people didn’t even realize my hair was that long.

And it was all for nothing.

But we did have a great time. We met up with some of our crazy friends who rode 50 miles that day. On their bikes. Uphill. Both ways. Ok, maybe not both ways. But 50 miles. They’re crazy. We had no part of that bike riding. We just came for the beer and the celebrities.