Perhaps you’ve heard about the little controversy Melissa’s gotten herself in to these days. You know drinking while your kids are around. Let’s discuss.

I don’t go to playdates with my kids. I’m at work all day and even trying to get together with friends on the weekend is a stretch. There just never seems to be enough time. And, honestly, we have five kids. Every day is a playdate. But I was trying to think if there were ever any times that I drink around our kids.

And the answer was a “hell yes.”

When we go to a kid’s event we [well, actually Lee never drinks, so I guess I should just say I] don’t normally drink. Like, for example, I don’t drink at birthday parties at Chuck-e-Cheese [even though I think they sell beer there so I guess I could if I wanted to]. But my entire family [aunts, uncles, cousins, kids, etc.] go out to dinner for the adult birthdays and I’ll have a glass of wine with my aunts. At Christmas time, my aunts, my grandma and I drink wine with dinner. I’ve been to many a BBQ or a candle party or a jewelry party where we bring our kids and many of the adults have a social drink. I’m not really following why that’s not ok.

If you’re drinking a whole bottle of wine and you’re slurring your words and tripping over you kids on the way to the bathroom to throw up…then, yes, that’s not ok. Especially if you are getting in to a car to drive your kids home after your martinis or wine drinking. If that’s the case you may want to contact your local AA. But one or two glasses of wine with other moms in your neighborhood or at dinner when your spouse is driving? What’s wrong with that?

In the Today Show piece Janet said something about being good examples for our kids. I’m not following how drinking a glass of wine is being a bad example. Ok, so alcohol’s not really good for you. But either are potato chips and I eat those in front of my kids. And if you’ve had a drink and your kids falls and breaks his arm you can’t go drive him to the emergency room. But you can still call 911. I couldn’t take the kids to the emergency room if I was high on Nyquil either [cause trust me that Nyquil can knock a mother out]. Moms are adults who can legally drink. Would it be better to hide the fact that sometimes we imbibe in an alcoholic drink so then it appears to be something we should be ashamed of? Is it wrong to let your kids see you drinking responsibly?

I’m with Melissa. This is just another way for some moms to point fingers at other moms. You’re a working mom? You must not love your kids as much as I do. You drink wine in front of your kids? Gasp! Call DHS.

And Meredith’s question about “what’s the difference [between a babysitter and mother]?” Excuse me? What the hell kind of question is that? That’s like asking your husband to “babysit” while you run to the store. He’s not babysitting. He’s their father. He’s just staying home. Meredith, who is a mother, honestly doesn’t see the difference between a babysitter and a parent? You’ve got to be kidding me. I mean I only get a babysitter when I put on my hoochie underwear and go to the bar to get sloppy drunk, not when I’m going to have just one or two. Duh, Meredith. [I’m kidding. I don’t think I needed to point out that I’m only kidding, but just in case I did…there it is.]

And Janet’s “there are other ways to have fun besides drinking” is a cop out. Yes there are other ways to unwind. And Melissa said she does yoga and she reads and she writes. But every now and then she wants to have a glass of wine with friends. And nobody has given me a good reason why she shouldn’t be allowed to do that. I didn’t hear Melissa say that every. single. day. she and her friends get together and drink all night long until they are so drunk they don’t even hear their kids crying. I got the impression that a couple times a month they get together over a salad to gossip and let the kids play. That’s bad because….???

Is the thought that if your children see you drinking, they will drink to? Umm…I’ve got news for you. If you hide the fact that you drink, it won’t matter. Cause there’s this place called high school where you’re kids go from around the ages of 13 to 18. And in high school there are these people called peers who have this vulcan like grip on your kids. And peer pressure is a bitch.

I’m not saying you should drink in front of your kids so you can show ‘em how it’s done. You definitely need to have a conversation with your kids about drinking. Let them know that when they are of age, if it’s something they choose to do, it’s something that needs to be done in moderation. Make sure they are aware of the risks. These are things they need to know so when they are faced with the pressure from peers they can make an informed decision. And no, I’m not saying tell your 14-year-old it’s ok to drink. Cause it’s not ok at 14. At 14 and 18 and even 20, it’s illegal. But it’s not illegal at 30, even if your kids are around. And it’s not something we need to be ashamed of.

And don’t even get me started on the double standard here. Because I have yet to hear about the controversy of dads coming home and cracking open a beer after work while watching the six o’clock news or on Sundays while he’s watching the game, right. in. front. of. the. kids. Oh my.

Update: Edited to add….Yeah, what she said.