Reasoning with a teenager
Mar 23, 2007 Help Me! I have a teenager
I set some new ground rules with Keaton and Justis today. I promised to be more timely with their allowance, paying them every other Friday when I get paid, and in return they won’t ask me for “loans.” I told them they need to figure out how to budget their allowance for the things they want. They seemed receptive to this.
Then I told them we decided they should do their own laundry. Up until this point I did their laundry, but just threw it back in their laundry baskets for them to hang up or fold and put away. Justis had a unit on how to do laundry when he was in eighth grade. He brought home a checklist of things he needed to do. This included sorting clothes, using the washing machine and dryer and ironing [which, honestly I never iron so he's one up on me there]. I walked him through it, he got an A in the unit and then we promptly threw all of his new found laundry knowledge out the window. But it’s time to bring it back. He’s ready for his own laundry responsibility. I’m a little worried it might be overwhelming for Keaton, but I’ll help him out in the beginning.
When I told Keaton I was going to have him do his own laundry he asked why. I said, “Because it will really help me out.” He goes, “Ok, I’m all about helping you out.” Oh, the sarcasm. It starts at such an early age these days.
Tonight Keaton and Justis went to an all night LAN party. When I was a kid we had overnight skating events. Now they have all night gaming parties. My how the times have changed.
Between Spencer’s soccer game and Skyler’s dance class we have a busy morning tomorrow. I told the boys I can either pick them up and take them to dance with me or they can ride the bus home. They chose the bus. Then Keaton said, “Are you going to give us a couple of bucks so we can ride the bus?”
Seriously? I’m all “didn’t we just have this no loans discussion like, oh I don’t know, five minutes ago?”
Keaton wasn’t buying it though. I said, “well the alternative is I pick you up and you go to dance with me or you don’t go to the LAN party.”
All of a sudden him using his own allowance money was a great idea. It’s funny how that logic works.
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March 24th, 2007 at 7:02 am
I love Mommy logic! My kids didn’t have school yesterday and wanted to go get ice cream. Funny, I needed the vehicle (large SUV/Mommy Bus) cleaned out. They fought me on it, but in the end, they cleaned the bus and I bought the ice cream.
March 26th, 2007 at 9:13 am
LOL! It seems discussions of allowance abound these days. we just set new ground rules with our kids about their allowances and setting a budget and not getting any “loans”. They aren’t really happy with me, especially when I told them that for each “i don’t want toooo moooomm” or “In a minute” response I get about their chores, I get to deduct five bucks from their allowance. OH well, live and learn. I’m guessing after a few weeks of zero balance, they’ll get the message
March 26th, 2007 at 7:14 pm
I don’t understand the “do your own laundry” thing. I have two teenagers. Laundry here is (and has been for MANY years) a family chore. EVERYONE does laundry. There is no picking and choosing and only washing your own things (and thereby eliminating that kid-think that says it’s okay to wash one tshirt and one pair of jeans and call it a full load). Everyone sorts, everyone puts clothes in the washer, everyone puts clothes in the dryer, everyone folds, everyone puts away. This is a family operation and therefore a team effort. There will be no “I’m only doing my own clothes” thing around here. It would be the same, in my mind, as everyone washing only the dishes they used, or sweeping the part of the floor they stood on, etc. Everyone lives here, everyone helps. *shrug*
p.s. no allowance here either, the kids earn their money by doing chores for neighbors and relatives. Now that the oldest is over 15, he has a job.