When I was a kid all we got from the nurse’s office was a band-aid
Oct 18, 2007 In my humble opinion
When I was in sixth grade I had to get my parents to sign a permission slip so I could participate in the “sex talk.” In those days it was mostly just photos of ovaries and what we need them for. Plus photos of penises [or is it peni?] and an explanation of it’s purpose [which, of course, sent the girls in to a fit of giggles]. I don’t remember discussing teen pregnancy or STDs or any of of the stuff they talk about today. Back then it was just a lesson on how our bodies work and how a baby is created.
At the beginning of each school year I sign a permission form so the nurse at my kids’ school can give them Tylenol without having to call me every time for my approval.
But in Maine kids can get birth control pills and patches without their parent’s permission. Middle school kids. Kids as young as 11 years old.
I’m not really sure how I feel about this for so many reasons.
First it breaks my heart a little [actually a lot] to think that 13 year old girls could be sexually active. Let alone 11 year olds. But I’m also not naive enough to think it doesn’t happen.
But is putting preteens on birth control without their parents permission the answer?
Some schools, including these schools in Maine, make condoms available to students. Some people believe that encourages kids to have sex. Some say kids will have sex anyway and at least this way they will be protected. I don’t know who’s right, but, in my book, condoms are a whole other ball game from birth control pills.
Condoms are a piece of latex on your skin. The Pill and patch are hormones that change your body. You can buy condoms in the aisle at a 7-11. You need a prescription to buy the Pill. Anybody can buy a condom. The Pill requires a physical exam by a doctor. Unless you’re allergic, condoms don’t have any side effects. The Pill has several side effects. You could take antibiotics and it will have no effect on the condom. If you are on antibiotics for an upper respiratory infection, it could either reduce the effectiveness of the Pill or interact with the Pill or both. A condom can protect you from both pregnancy AND sexually transmitted diseases. The Pill may stop a pregnancy, but it won’t stop that itch.
Plus the Pill needs to be taken every single day, preferably at the same time each day. I can’t even get my teenagers to remember to wash their face every day without prompting. But an 11 year old is going to remember to take her birth control every single day? Is the health center going to call her down to the office every day to have her take the Pill like the nurses office would do for a kid on Amoxycillin? At least with a condom kids know they need to use one every time they have sex. The Pill may give them a false sense of protection since they think “I’m on the pill” and may not realize that since they forgot to take it three times last week they might still get pregnant.
As a parent I want to be able to help my children make good decisions about what goes in to his/her body. If my daughter and I discuss it and if we decide she should go on the Pill [I think I just vomited in my mouth a little even thinking about that conversation], then I want it to be our decision after much conversation and consideration. I want to be aware so I can make sure she’s taking it and she’s being safe with it. I want my child’s doctor to have her full medical history when he’s trying to diagnosis other possible conditions. And it makes me mad that there are schools out there that would take that right away from me.
But then on the other hand I can understand why these health centers were opened in schools in the first place. Some of these kids grow up in households where there either isn’t enough support or there isn’t enough money [or both] for the child to see a doctor when needed. Some children grow up not having a parent to discuss these things with. Some children don’t have very good role models in their homes. Unfortunately some parents are lacking at their jobs and the schools have had to pick up the slack. Some kids desperately need these health centers to get the care they’ve been without. And for these kids I’m glad they have access to a health center and to a nurse or doctor who can make sure they are healthy.
It just seems like the good parents are suffering because of the actions of the not-so-good parents. And that just sucks.
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Tags: birth control at school, condoms, Maine health centers, parental consent for birth control, the Pill
October 19th, 2007 at 11:36 am
This is a really well-written post. I wonder if the (in my opinion, stupid) school board took into account all you said — and all (most) people know — about the pill being so drastically different from condoms. I feel like this is going to dumb down the importance of exams and figuring out if the pill is safe enough for the girl taking it. That and many girls won’t take it like they should and thus wreck havoc on their hormones and body.
October 19th, 2007 at 11:45 am
My wife and I were talking about this same article yesterday. You said exactly everything we thought. I think it really comes down to parents not wanting to take the responsibility to be parents. This leaves the schools to take this action to “Protect” themselves from lawsuits.
Unfortunately, we no longer live in a society were kids can remain innocent of all these outside influences as long as our generation was able to. It really is sad. I just wish we would spend 1/10th the amount of money on domestic issues that would keep our kids safe and happy as we do on the middle east. I think our kids would be much happier for it.
But then again, that just may be me.
October 19th, 2007 at 5:17 pm
no i dont think its just you..its me too!
kids these days arent as innocent as they once were…
: (
October 19th, 2007 at 5:17 pm
care to trade links with my humor blog?
check it out at http://jaysmoney.blogspot.com
October 23rd, 2007 at 6:50 pm
You have done a great job articulating so many of my same thoughts on this – I know this is a tough issue, but I would not want the school giving my child access to the pill – for so many of the same reasons as you have stated.
We are having this same conversation at WearyParent right now, too. I have so many questions on the topic and it is definitely a topic that spurs some very emotional reactions – and rightly so.
October 24th, 2007 at 7:10 am
I became sexually active at 13. I was not on anything to protect myself. I am SO torn on these issues! I personally think I wouldn’t have become active if I had a better mom, so in this case, perhaps if the school system had stepped in… But I HAVE an 11-year-old daughter and I can’t imagine her needing anything or even thinking about it at all! We’re into Little Pet Shop here, not sex.
In so many ways, I believe we parents need to step up. In that way, schools and such wouldn’t have to. But when parents don’t, what then?
A touchy, sensitive topic for me, as you know…