There’s some controversy over at Work-It Mom regarding their decision to feature a new series titled 10 Reasons Working Moms Should Feel Great About Themselves. This series is written by the controversial author of the book The Feminist Mistake; Leslie Bennetts. Some people are so passionate about their hatred for Ms. Bennetts they’ve decided to leave the Work-It Mom community. Seriously?!? It still amazes me that people get so heated over this stay-at-home mom vs. working mom debate. Why do you care what anybody thinks about the decision you’ve made for your family? Nobody knows your family like you do. You make the best decision you know how to make. We’re all just doing the best we can.

I’m a working mother. I don’t care whether other people think that’s a good thing or a bad thing. I do it because that’s what works for our family. I’m happy with my decision and my kids are doing just fine thank you very much.

Other than staying home with mom, we’ve tried out every other care option with our kids and I think they’ve all turned out equally as smart and well-behaved as they would have if they had stayed home with me.

Keaton went to an awesome daycare that really prepared him for school. He new how to write his name and read simple words before he started kindergarten. It was more than the majority of his class knew at that point. He’s in eighth grade and he’s been scoring at the college level on our state basic skills tests for the last couple years. Part of that was the daycare and part of that is his genetic makeup. He’s just a smart kid. He would be a smart kid whether he went to daycare or stayed home with me.

Skyler & Spencer spent their days at home daycares with women I know personally and absolutely trust. These women truly loved Skyler & Spencer and Skyler & Spencer loved them right back. Then they went to preschool on the same campus where they now attend elementary school. Today they are very good students and thriving well.

Caleb stayed home with dad (where he was spoiled rotten) and then went to the same preschool as Skyler & Spencer. He had quite an adjustment with preschool because at home everything was always about him. Then he started school and he had to share time with other kids. But he learned a lot in preschool and really had a great time. He loved playing with the kids and learning new things. And now he’s rocking it in kindergarten.

We made the decision for Lee to stay home after he was laid off because I made more money and he couldn’t find another job that made it worth paying $300 a week in daycare. Plus he wanted to go back to school. So financially I have to work because I have to support my family. But honestly, that’s not the only reason I work. I love working. I may not always love my job, but I’m the type of person who thrives on chaos and always being busy. I work better under pressure and when I’m home I find myself being very lazy. I need somebody cracking the whip to motivate me.

However I have made changes in my career since I had kids. In the beginning I wanted to be this big super mom who could do everything. I was determined to be a very successful businesswoman and a great mom. But eventually I realized it’s just not possible. At least not for me. So I gave up my goal of being CEO of some big company and decided to find something a little more flexible.

I quit several jobs in the past that just didn’t fit me. If I wasn’t happy I wasn’t afraid to find something better. Today I have a job that, although it’s not perfect, it gives me the opportunity to be the mom I want to be. I have the flexibility I need. I get to leave to go to school parties or go on field trips. I have parent/teacher conferences in the middle of the day. I get to attend the kids’ after school activities. I get to have my career and still be there for my kids. It rocks.

You just need to decide what your goals are and what’s important to you. If you believe staying home with your kids is best, then do it. If you want to work, then do it. Do what’s right for you and your family. Don’t let anybody else tell you how to live your life. Whether your a stay-at-home mom or a working mom be proud of it. Who cares what Ms. Bennetts or anybody else has to say.

This entry was posted on Wednesday, March 19th, 2008 at 9:35 pm and is filed under Working Wednesday. Comments are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.