The Bean Blog

I’m just a bill. Sitting here on Capitol Hill.

Sep 2, 2008 Dude, you're gettin' an 'A'

After my Mass Media Industry class this morning I have lost all faith in the American school system. In this class we are discussing the law, ethics and history of mass media. Today was our first law lecture. We started with the basics. What’s a plaintiff? What’s a defendant? What are the sources of law? Things like that.

Then our professor asked us, “how does a bill become a law?” Most of my class is young early twenty-somethings plus one 18-year-old freshman. So none of them are schooled in all things Schoolhouse Rock. They were truly deprived as children. Today’s kids are watching shows like Spongebob Squarepants instead of the three minute educational cartoons that are Schoolhouse Rock. Plus kids nowadays can watch cartoons 24/7 rather than having to wait until Saturday morning. Now they can sleep in on Saturday mornings because they can just watch their cartoons on Friday night. What has become of the world? Spoiled rotten kids.

Umm…where was I? Oh yeah. Schoolhouse Rock.

So the second he asked that question I started singing the “I’m just a bill” song in my head. (On a side note, Lee also started singing the song when I came home and told him our teacher wanted us to tell him how a bill becomes a law. We are truly kids of the ’80s.) But the youngins in my class were having some trouble explaining the process. (See Schoolhouse Rock needs to come back. It should be shown in all classrooms. The Presidential candidates need to seriously consider this for their campaigns before the November election.)

One girl was able to explain that a bill starts in Congress (which if you know the “I’m just a bill” song you know that’s not true. A bill starts as an idea. Duh!). She then went on to say if Congress votes for it then it goes to the President to get signed.

Our professor then asked her what Congress was. She was confused so he reworded it. What makes up Congress? She still had no clue. What?!? You don’t know what makes up the United States Congress? Do they not teach this in school anymore?

So our professor tried to help her out. “Who is Dave Loebsack,” he asked. I’ll give her this one. A lot of people don’t know their congressmen by name and Loebsack is fairly new. So he went ahead and told her Loebsack is an Iowa Representative.

Then he asked, “Who is Tom Harkin?” The girl, plus at least two other people in the class, said, “Isn’t he the governor?”

And that’s when my head exploded. Big goey blood and brains all over the classroom. Because seriously?!? You don’t know who your own state’s governor is? Really?

For the record, Tom Harkin is an Iowa Senator who has been a Senator for I’m pretty sure my entire life. The Iowa governor is Chet Culver. If nothing else you should know who your state governor is. If you don’t, go look it up now. I’ll wait.

Ok, we good?

So then we went back to the “what makes up Congress?” question. Even with the professors help nobody was answering the question. So he resorted to drawing on the white board. And let me tell you, my professor cannot draw his way out of a cardboard box. If he didn’t tell us he was drawing the state capital on the board I would have had no idea what the hell that box with a penis was.

On his box/penis drawing the professor put an “A” on one side and a “B” on the other side. The state capital has two sections. What’s in the “A” section? Still silence.

Seriously people. We just went through the Loebsack/Harkin discussion and you still don’t know what makes up Congress? Did you not have your morning Mt. Dew?

Finally we put an end to my excruitiating pain and (apparently) the majority of the class learned that the Senate and the House of Representatives make up Congress. I wonder if these kids know there are three branches of government. Shit I wonder if these kids even know who the President is.

So now I’ve decided I’m going to buy the Schoolhouse Rock DVD for my kids. ‘Cause I’ll be damned if my kids don’t know how a bill becomes a law. I want my kids to break out in to song right there in the middle of their college classroom belting, “I’m just a bill. Yes, I’m only a bill. And I’m sitting here on Capitol Hill.”

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Tags: Chet Culver, college, Congress, Dave Loebsack, House of Representatives, I'm Just a Bill, Schoolhouse Rock, Senate, Tom Harkin