I hate when he farts in bed. I hate when he throws his smelly socks at me. I hate when he forgets to shut the cabinet door after pulling something out of the cupboard. I hate that when he does laundry he just piles it on the counter for me to fold. I hate that when he pulls a shirt off the hanger he flings the hanger up so it’s no longer lined up with all the other hangers. I hate that his underwear basket is always pulled out (since his clothes are in the laundry room ’cause they don’t fit in our walk-in closet) so that when I do laundry I knock it over…every…single…time. I hate that he never changes the toilet paper roll. I hate that he leaves computer parts all over the family room.

BUT…

I love that he takes care of me. I love that he will run to the store to buy me cold medicine. Or candy. Or soda. Just because I ask. I love that he puts gasoline in my car without me even asking. I love that he goes to the store with me because he knows I hate to shop alone. I love that he will pick me up from the bar after a night out with my friends no matter what time it is. I love that he makes dinner several nights a week. I love that is such a good dad. I love that he has such a big heart. I love when he spoons with me at night. I love that he wakes me up every morning to give me a kiss good-bye. I love that he lets me park in the garage while he parks in the cold and has to scrape his windows every morning in the winter. I love that he’ll miss watching football for the kids’ events or a family event…even though he really doesn’t want to. I love that he was a stay-at-home dad for six years. I love that he’s determined. I love that he worked so hard to go back to school and get his degree. I love that he made a commitment to stop drinking and has been sober for over five years. I love that he’s a great role model. I love that he loves me unconditionally. I love that he supports me…even when he disagrees with me.

I love you Lee! Thank you for the last 17 years. It’s been a [mostly] wonderful 13 years of wedded bliss. And I can’t wait for many, many more!

For our “honeymoon” after we renewed our vows, we took a family vacation to Disney World. Keaton and Justis were so excited. It would be their first time on an airplane. And their first time to Disney World.

However, the morning after the renewal, I was really starting to reconsider my decision to drink peppermint schnapps the night before. Lots of peppermint schnapps. On the rocks.

I don’t remember what time we had to leave for the airport. But I do remember it being way earlier than I would have liked. When I had a hangover. Lee had to basically push me out of bed and in to the bathroom to get showered and ready to go.

My head was pounding so bad and my stomach was sour. I laid on the floor in the bathroom using my towel as a pillow, willing the room to stop spinning. Lee banged on the door, “Are you in the shower yet? I can see you laying on the floor.” So I dragged my sorry butt off the floor and got ready for the airport.

Once we got to Florida and checked in at our hotel (the Wilderness Lodge), we walked passed the hotel bar to get to our room. I almost hurled right there on the carpet ’cause I could smell the peppermint schnapps from the bar. It was a rough trip.

But once I got some sleep (and drank lots of water) I was feeling much better. And we had a fantastic trip. Watching Keaton and Justis get so excited as they dragged us to the next ride or when they saw another Disney character who’s autograph they could add to their autograph book was the best sight ever. It took me back to my first trip to Disney World when I was a young teen.

We went to Magic Kingdom, Epcot, MGM Studios, Animal Kingdom and Blizzard Beach. Keaton and Justis were very brave at just 4- and 6-years-old. They rode all the rides I thought were scary; including the Tower of Terror and the HUGE drop slide at Blizzard Beach. Keaton was disappointed when he discovered he was too short for some of the rides. He wanted to do it all.

At Animal Kingdom the boys each got a big dinosaur toy. One day when we came back to the room after a long day at one of the parks we found the dinosaurs in the bathroom. The maid staff had strategic placed the dinosaurs with toilet paper strung around the toilet and in the dinosaurs’ mouths. It was hilarious. And a great surprise. All Disney employees sure know how to make little boys’ dreams come true.

And then we all lived happily ever after…or something like that.

At 7pm on Saturday, November 14, 1998, Lee and I stood before our family and friends, at the altar of the church where I was baptized and confirmed, and renewed our marriage vows.

During the ceremony the pastor read 1 Corinthians 13:

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophesy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.

Keaton and Justis joined us to light the unity candle. It was such a sweet moment that I will cherish forever.

We said traditional vows …till death do us part… and then exchanged our new wedding bands.

After the ceremony we headed over to our reception. It was a traditional wedding reception in this huge party room behind a popular bar. We had a big head table with all of the wedding party. There were purple and silver balloons all over. And purple candle centerpieces.

There was food. And lots of it. Since our renewal was at 7pm we didn’t have a meal per say. Instead we had lots and lots of hors d’oeuvres.

Of course, there was dancing. Lee and I danced to LeAnn Rimes’ How Do I Live for our first song.

And there was definitely cake. Thankfully Lee and I kept it clean. We didn’t shove the cake in each other’s mouths.

Plus there was tons of alcohol. Oh WOW was there a lot of alcohol. I was really hurting the next day when we were catching our plane for our “honeymoon.”

When Lee was a child Granny had to take him to the ER so many times, I’m surprised they haven’t yet named a wing after him. He’s broken bones, had concussions, gotten hit by a car, been in a car accident, and gotten stitches so many times he’s practically the bionic man now.

This hanging out the ER syndrome is something Lee passed on to his boys. Especially Caleb. Caleb’s had stitches in his head three times. And on his face twice. He’s also broken his arm. And he’s only 8. He hasn’t even really started playing sports yet. I shiver just thinking about what lies ahead for us.

Last Tuesday Spencer had a friend over to play video games. I have really thought about giving our xbox away to charity because the boys fight over it so much. “Mom Spencer won’t let me play Red Dead Redemption.” “Caleb you’re supposed to go to the left.” “Why did you just kill me.” It’s enough to make my head explode right off my body.

Caleb swears he wasn’t mad [but I don't really believe that...I think they were AGAIN fighting over the video game] when he threw a pair of Spencer’s shorts. He says he was just trying to throw them in to the laundry room [which really is just a throw away from their bedroom]. But the shorts hit Spencer friend.

The friend reacted by throwing the shorts back at Caleb who had turned around and was walking away. The shorts [along with the belt attached] hit Caleb in the back of the head, cutting it open. I was upstairs straightening my hair for my upcoming meeting and I heard them yelling at each other but tried to drown them out. I could hear the friend telling Caleb, “Go tell your mom.” I figured he was just making fun of him for being a tattle tale or something.

But when Caleb reached the bathroom and told me his head hurt, I sighed and told him we’d get him some ice. That’s when I noticed the blood dripping down his neck. I yelled, “OH MY GOD! WHAT HAPPENED?” and then remembered I needed to stay calm or else I’d freak him out.

Caleb was whimpering “Do I have to get stitches? I don’t want to get stitches.” I started to clean up the cut. At first it didn’t look too bad. I said, “No I don’t think it’s bad enough for stitches.”

But after I got all the blood cleaned up I realized he had a pretty deep gash in his head. And YES it likely did require stitches.

It was after-hours for the doctor’s office so we headed over to the closest walk-in clinic. The place was empty so we got right in. The nurse took a look at it. Cleaned it up some more. And then told us the doctor would be in to either put in stitches or staples.

Caleb’s eyes got really, really big. STAPLES! He was horrified.

When the doctor came in Caleb meekly asked, “Are you stapling my head?”

The doctor assured him he was just going to use stitches. But as he was answering the question he turned sideways and Caleb could see the big needle with Novocaine in it. He gasped. The doctor turned to try to hide the needle. But the damage was already done.

We assured Caleb that it would just pinch for a minute and then it would be all numb. All he’d feel after that would be maybe a little tugging. The doctor put in the needle and Skyler & I held Caleb’s hand. That kid sure has a tight grip.

A few minutes later the doctor poked Caleb in the head a few dozen times with the needle. Caleb didn’t even flinch. So the Novocaine was working.

Caleb ended up with three stitches in the back of his head. He was so proud of himself. He doesn’t remember any of the other times he’s had stitches. So he went home and bragged about how brave he was. Now he has a war story to share with all his friends.

Today we went back to the walk-in clinic to get the stitches out. The place was packed today. And it smelled like sickness. You know me and my OCD. I was freaking out. I had to go outside for a little bit to get some fresh air. After about 30 minutes in the waiting room they finally called Caleb’s name. With relief I signed “THANK GOD.”

Caleb’s hair is dark. And the stitches are dark. So the nurse tried to cut them out without also giving Caleb a haircut. She struggled a little bit with the first one. But eventually got it out without Caleb even realizing it. She went to through it away, but Caleb was trying to see it. So she set it next to him. I’m pretty sure he would have taken those stitches home for show-and-tell if she would have let him.

The next two stitch removals were a little bit painful. I could see him tense up a little so I grabbed his hand. He told the nurse, “That one hurt a little bit.”

But the last one came out easy too. So he’s all stitched up. And all better. He’s such a brave kid.

I hope this is the last emergency visit. But somehow I doubt that.