You’re invited to my pity party

I’m having a little pity party for myself. Tomorrow is my birthday. I’m going to be 32. And nobody cares.

My family on my mother’s side always gets together for birthdays. Usually we go out to dinner. My grandma takes care of the celebration for her own kids; my mom, my aunt, my uncle, and my aunt[-in-law]. And my aunt and uncle have parties at their house for their three kids.

Except for a couple of years, my mom has not lived in town for the last 25 years or so. So she doesn’t organize my birthday.

Plus, not that it has anything to do with my mom’s side of the family, but my dad also doesn’t live in town, so we don’t celebrate with him either. [But his birthday was this last Wednesday and he got to enjoy it by driving 8 hours to Canada for work. Woo hoo. He really knows how to live it up. Happy Birthday Dad.]

And my mom’s birthday is Tuesday. [Happy Birthday Mommy!]

In the past, since my mom and I have birthdays so close together, we have all gone out to dinner to celebrate both of our birthdays. But even when we do this my mom picks the place we go to eat at. One year she even picked a chinese restaurant. And she knows I can’t stand chinese food. So I got to celebrate my birthday at a restaurant where I wouldn’t eat anything. Fun.

I know, I know. I’m going to be 32. Why am I being so childish about who is going to organize my birthday celebration? I should just be happy that I’ve been blessed with another year on this earth and another year with my husband and my children.

But I want somebody to recognize my birthday, damnit. I can’t help it.

This year my mom won’t be coming to town until the Fourth of July. So we are going to go out to dinner then. I spoke to my grandma last night and she goes, “Do you care if we give you your gifts when we go out to dinner in July?”

It’s not about the gifts. I love the gifts they give me and I really appreciate them going to that effort. But I would just be happy if they would like to celebrate my birthday somewhere around my birthday. I would like to have my special day.

This has made me very sensivite about Skyler & Spencer’s birthday. Obviously they share the same birthday. And right now they want to celebrate their birthday together. But I am prepared for the day when they want to have their own parties. And I want to give them their own parties. I think they deserve their own parties because they are two different people. I want them to know how much I appreciate their lives. Of course, I let them know how important they are to me every single day. But I like to have that one day, their birthday, were everybody else gets to join in the celebration too.

But besides the fact that I always have to share my birthday, my husband even forgot my birthday. I got some gifts in the mail from my mom today. I sat here and opened them right in front of Lee. He never once asked me why I was opening gifts.

So I said, “Do you even have anything planned for my birthday?”

He goes, “When is it?”

I refused to answer him. (1) We’ve been together for over 13 years. And he doesn’t know when my birthday is yet? And (2) I wrote my birthday down on the calendar in the kitchen where I write all of the month’s activities for everybody. Obviously nobody looks at that so I might as well stop spending the first day of every month writing that out.

Then he goes, “Well probably not since you have school. Don’t you have class on Monday and Wednesday nights?”

With a great deal of attitude I said, “Yes, I do have class on Monday and Wednesday nights.”

Then there was silence.

Finally, he goes, “Do I have the wrong day.”

I said, “Well if you think I have class on my birthday, then yes you have the wrong day.”

At least my work friends remembered my birthday. They all gave me a very funny card and a gift certificate to Target. One of my co-workers told me to spend the money on myself. I figured “yeah right. I never buy myself anything.” But now that my family can’t even give me one freaking day of appreciation I’m going to buy myself something. I just don’t know what yet.

Oh and my best friends called me out on her blog. Isn’t that sweet? But she’s still significantly older than me.

I’ll get out of this funk shortly. I just needed a moment to vent. Happy Birthday to me!